i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Randomize