I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
