Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize