My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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