No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
How does one acquire holy water?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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