Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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