...so i touched it.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
