that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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