I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Randomize
