i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
