where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
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