dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
