I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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