From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize