It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
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