I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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