she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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