Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
