the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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