Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
