love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
don't judge my taste in strippers
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
