it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
