I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
