pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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