is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
