Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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