the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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