I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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