I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize