Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
