i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
