it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
