Sponge bath it is.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
