that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
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