With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
