i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
