I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
