All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
