ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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