those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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