..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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