I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
She's JV to your varsity
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
