he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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