I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
vagina is talking i cant
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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