Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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