i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
