Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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