Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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