I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
