I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
